Welcome Today's Featured Author
Andrew Mackay!!
(In Their
Shoes Book 1)
By Andrew Mackay
4.99 OR FREE ON KU
Praise for In Their Shoes - The Teacher
"... very funny... with an
irreverent and acerbic tone!"
"Very funny... dark and twisted
in places... would definitely recommend!"
"Hilarious and dark!"
"Shocking and funny. A definite
must-read!"
Blurb:
Cheating, lying, cutting class... and
that's just the staff!!
Why are teachers leaving the
profession, skipping work with stress and dying less than a year
after retirement?
Rachel is one of the high school’s
best teachers. She gets on well with everyone. The kids like her. The
staff like her less, but only because the kids like her and not them.
But annoying managers, obnoxious
students, needlessly excessive paperwork, useless training sessions
and catastrophic amounts of marking have Rachel wondering if she
should just quit and pursue her dreams of becoming a writer.
Meet fresh-faced and eager journalist
Joy Attwood. She's about to spend the day with Rachel to discover
what being a high school teacher is really like. No frills, no red
carpet, no gimmicks - just straight into the S#!T!
Rachel will reveal all her underhand
tricks of the trade - from managing unruly behaviour, to cutting
corners when marking work - for the sake of the book you're about to
read. Joy has picked one of the worst days to follow this pi$$ed off
high school teacher.
Can Joy survive the day without wanting
to kill someone, or will Rachel beat her to it?
The Actor: Surviving Celebrity Gossip,
Fame and Social Media (In Their Shoes Book 2)
By Andrew Mackay
4.99 OR FREE ON KU
Praise for In Their Shoes - The Actor
"... very funny... with an
irreverent and acerbic tone!"
"Very funny... dark and twisted
in places... would definitely recommend!"
"Hilarious and dark!"
"Shocking and funny. A definite
must-read!"
Blurb:
British actor Pat Cake is trying hard
to be everybody... but himself.
Well-known character actor Pat Cake has
made quite a name for himself in British crime movies. After all he
has accomplished, landing the pivotal role in the new sequel, Jesus
Christ Social Media Star, in London’s West End was just another
feather in his cap.
For Joy Attwood this new assignment is
raising the stakes. Last time out she accidentally left her subject
without a job. This time, she’ll have to convince the media
spotlight that she’s not providing Pat with a different kind of
‘job'!
Throughout her tumultuous day, Joy will
have her fingers smashed in a car door, been on the receiving end of
obnoxious and vulgar film crews and become the target of the most
salacious social media backlash since [name removed on legal
advice]’s incident with that gerbil and the drugs.
Joy discovers that sometimes the bright
lights of the big stage aren’t quite as gleaming as you might
think. As Pat helps Joy navigate the cutthroat world of acting, her
biggest challenge just might come from getting too involved with the
subject she’s following. Can Joy survive the day under the watchful
eye of the adoring public? Or will her anxious and shy demeanour
give her up as a fool in front of thousands of people?
The Model: A Vicious Satire on the
Modelling Industry (In Their Shoes Book 3)
By Andrew Mackay
4.99 OR FREE ON KU
Praise for In Their Shoes - The Model
"… A glamorous nightmare… I
loved almost every devastating page!"
"Very funny... dark and twisted
in places... would definitely recommend!"
"… He kept this reader
constantly guessing as to what could possible happen next!"
"Shocking and funny. A definite
must-read!"
Blurb
I Know What You Wore Last Summer.
Well-known Russian Supermodel, Oksana
Volkov, scratched and clawed her way to the top of London’s most
notable fashion runways. Highly sought-after and ruthless, the
Russian diva is under no illusion that her career is threatened by
younger models emerging onto the scene.
Armed with a brash disposition and a
bitter resolve to end her career on a strong note, Oksana readies
herself to face the crowds of the hottest fashion event in London –
The Synapse/Vladychestvo Fashion Show - and kill the runway one last
time. And maybe a few of the other models while she’s at it!
For journalist Joy Attwood this new
assignment is so much more than simply raising the stakes, it is
critical to her success. Despite feeling responsible for the events
on the West End Stage, Joy knows without a doubt that unless she can
reign in her personal flaws, everything she has worked for will be
gone in the blink of an eye.
When a questionable request from one of
the fashion industry’s most famous players forces her to test the
boundaries of her own morality, Joy finds herself walking a very
anorexic line; the most dangerous she has yet to cross in the name of
journalism.
With all eyes watching the splendour of
the fashion world, Joy discovers that some things are not always what
they seem. All runway lights cast shadows. Just how far will she go
to discover the truth beyond the curtain? Can Joy survive the bright
lights of the runway stage?
And what’s the deal with the new
fashion trends “selfie/harm” and “Tyrannarexia”?
In Their Shoes Trilogy
8.99 OR FREE ON KU
By Andrew Mackay
Praise for the In Their Shoes series
"... totally irreverent, brash,
controversial, vulgar, politically incorrect ... a wild ride!"
"Very funny... dark and twisted in
places... would definitely recommend!"
"… kept this reader constantly
guessing as to what could possibly happen next!"
"Shocking and funny. A definite
must-read!"
Meet newbie journalist Joy Attwood. She’s
fresh-faced, eagle-eyed, bushy-tailed… and totally out of her
depth!
Rammed-solid with amazing illustrations by
Kreacher, In Their Shoes: The Trilogy is the first three best selling
books in the groundbreaking series from Chrome Valley Books and
British author Andrew Mackay. Tag along with journalist Joy Attwood,
as she follows a different profession for the day to find out what
their job is really like…
The Teacher (Book I) – Cheating, lying,
cutting class… and that’s just the staff! Joy Attwood, fresh from
redundancy at her safe manager job, decides to become a journalist.
This first assignment has her follow stressed-out and hungover high
school teacher Rachel Weir. The kids are unruly. Rachel's colleagues
are mad, boring or on the brink of self-destruct. Can Joy
successfully teach a class of her own... ?
The Actor (Book II) – After the success
of The Teacher (well, apart from what happened to Rachel, anyway) our
intrepid and hungry journalist Joy Attwood follows British actor Pat
Cake for the day. Together they’ll attend auditions, voice-overs,
film sets, theatre shows and incur the wrath of the salacious media.
Joy will be the centre of attention, left to fend for herself, and
right up s#!t creek without a paddle!
The Model (Book III) - The universe made a
mistake when it made supermodel Oksana Volkov. The media insists
she’s the most beautiful woman in the world. She has taken the
fashion world by storm. Her time is nearly up, though – she’s
getting older and younger ‘meat’ is lining up to take her place.
Joy Attwood joins her for the day and finds that she, too, is not
immune to the allure of glamour and vast sums of money. Will Joy
break her own moral code of values and decency to get the story she
really wants? The Model is an unflinching satirical masterpiece with
an unforgettable and shocking conclusion.
If you love British humor, satire and
suspense (think John Cleese, Helen Fielding, Tom Sharpe, Kurt
Vonnegut and Imogen Edwards-Jones) then pick up In Their Shoes - The
Trilogy now!
Read In Their Shoes - The Trilogy for FREE
with your Kindle Unlimited subscription and look for it under Humor
and Satire.
The Artist: An Explosive, Action-Packed
Thrill Ride! (In Their Shoes Book 4)
By Andrew Mackay
4.99 OR FREE ON KU
Praise for In Their Shoes - The Artist:
"... Totally irreverent, brash,
controversial, vulgar, politically incorrect ... a wild ride!"
"Very funny... dark and twisted
in places... would definitely recommend!"
"Hilarious and dark!"
"Shocking and funny. A definite
must-read!"
Blurb:
First, they smashed the art scene. Now
they’ll smash the system.
Artist Jake Priestley has made quite a
name for himself at a young age. Claiming the coveted Soul Flame
Grand Prize of seven million euros had been more of a stroke of dumb
luck than intentional tenacity. But that was nothing compared to the
immense art event being held in Paris. As Jake and his team, The
Chemical Collective, gear up for the big day ahead of them, there is
nothing that will stop him from taking home the Grand Prize…
For journalist Joy Attwood the stakes
have become stratospheric. And that’s a hell of a height to fall
from!
With her marriage torn apart by a
single, ill-fated decision to erase all traces of her runway
encounters, there is no doubt that her life is spiraling, out of
control. But when the days with Jake turn from bizarre to downright
terrifying she finds herself in the midst a terrifying heist
situation.
This time that she’s bitten off more
than she can chew. And as for swallowing…
Can Joy Attwood survive the dark
streets of Paris? Or will The Artist’s true colours prove to be the
last thing she ever sees? The fate of an iconic landmark is at stake.
Joy fears that the only way out this
time could be in a body bag.
The Artist is the fourth book in the
groundbreaking series from Chrome Valley Books and British
author
Andrew Mackay.
In
Their Shoes Book 5 The Nurse
By Andrew Mackay
4.99 OR FREE ON KU
Praise for In Their Shoes - The Nurse
"The
Nurse captures and intensifies the chaos and bureaucracy of working
in the health service. It will reduce the reader to tears of outrage,
shock and hilarity!" - Jo Taylor, Student Nurse, UK"
It’ll
take a bucket-load of guts, heart and patients to survive this one!
The
inpatients are getting impatient.
The
psychiatric ward is losing its mind.
The
maternity ward is suffering a midwife crisis.
Welcome
to the graveyard shift at Shotterlay
General Hospital.
It’s
chucking-out time at the bars on Valentine’s weekend, and chucking
up time down at the hospital. The poor, sick and infirm in the
waiting area are revolting… in
more ways than one!
Soon,
Shotterlay’s
Accident & Emergency department won’t be so much A-OK, as DOA.
None of this will stop Sangita Gallagher, though. She’s the
hospital’s charge nurse and runs an incredibly tight ship;
expediently plugging holes in the paperwork, shift patterns and her
patients’ gory wounds.
Tonight’s
medical mayhem will be journalist Joy Attwood’s toughest assignment
yet. It’ll involve copious amounts of violence, blood, vomit,
mucous, amniotic fluid, lacerations, fractures, amputations, heart
attacks, fornication and pulling things out of unwashed bottoms.
It’s
absolute chaos and should really come with a trigger warning!
If
you love British humor, satire and gross-out farce (think John
Cleese, Helen Fielding, Tom Sharpe, Kurt Vonnegut and Imogen
Edwards-Jones) then you cannot afford to miss out on In
Their Shoes - The Artist!
Read
In
Their Shoes - The Nurse
for FREE
with your Kindle
Unlimited
subscription and look for it under Humor and Satire.
In Their Shoes The Professional Collection
By
Andrew Mackay
9.99 or FREE on KU
"...
about as brilliant and funny as writing can get..."
“My
mouth was hanging open and my heart was racing. Damn, Andrew is good
at what he does!!!!!”
Meet your new favourite superhero, Joy Attwood. She’s a loving wife, fearsome journalist… and way in over her head!
In
Their Shoes: The Professional Collection is the first five books in
this screamingly funny British satire series chronicling the
outrageous adventures of Joy Attwood as she joins a profession for
the day.
This special edition collection features exclusive illustrations by series artist Kreacher, each one signed by both he and author Andrew Mackay.
Included
in this collection:
✍The
Teacher (Book I)
– Cheating, lying, cutting class… and that’s just the staff!
Joy Attwood, fresh from redundancy at her safe manager job, decides
to become a journalist. This first assignment has her follow
stressed-out and hungover high school teacher Rachel Weir – with
shocking results! The Teacher is the best-selling, groundbreaking
British satire that kicks off the In Their Shoes series...
🎥The
Actor (Book II)
– Joy joins British actor Pat Cake for the day in London. They’ll
attend auditions, voice-overs, film sets, theatre shows and incur the
wrath of the salacious media. Joy will be the centre of attention,
left to fend for herself, and right up s#!t creek without a paddle!
💃The
Model (Book III)
- Joy follows supermodel Oksana Volkov with very unexpected results.
Can Attwood resist the money in exchange for everything she holds
dear? Will her newly acquired investigative skills ultimately get her
in trouble? In Oksana Volkov, Joy may finally have met her match.
investigative
skills ultimately get her in trouble? In Oksana Volkov, Joy may
finally have met her match.
🎨
The
Artist (Book IV)
- Join the Fight. That’s what Joy did quite inadvertently when Jake
Priestley suggested he follow him for the day. But Jake is no
ordinary artist, and his gang, The Chemical Collective is no ordinary
bunch of vandals. His agenda will put an iconic European landmark at
stake and Joy Attwood right in the firing line.
💉The
Nurse (Book V)
- Blood, vomit, mucous, amniotic fluid, lacerations, fractures,
amputations, heart attacks, fornication and pulling things out of
bottoms. Tonight’s medical menu is absolute chaos… and should
really come with a trigger warning!
If
you love British humor, satire and suspense (think John Cleese, Helen
Fielding, Tom Sharpe, Kurt Vonnegut and Imogen Edwards-Jones) then
pick up In Their Shoes: The Professional Collection right now!
Read
In Their Shoes - The Professional Collection for FREE
with your Kindle
Unlimited
subscription and look for it under Humor and Satire.
In
Their Shoes: The Dealer
By
Andrew Mackay
5.99
or FREE On KU
“Joy Attwood, successful and fearless
journalist? Call me D-REZ.
If you...
Fuck up a task
Go to the police
Ask any questions
Tell anyone about me, or
Try to run…
I will kill you.”
I will kill you.”
About Andrew Mackay
Some authors dare not cross the line.
International Best-selling author Andrew Mackay makes it his starting
point.
A novelist, screenwriter and former
teacher, Mackay is the creator of groundbreaking satire series ‘In
Their Shoes’; the hilarious and often shocking journey of fictional
newbie journalist Joy Attwood. The first two books in the series (The
Teacher and The Actor) are best sellers in Amazon’s “satire”
category (UK and US).
Self-proclaimed "Antisocial
Justice Warrior" Mackay is also founder of Chrome Valley Books -
“The Home of Dangerous Fiction”. Never knowingly inoffensive, his
works often contain a ruthless commentary on society, delving into
the more darker and disturbing machinations of modern life - but
always with a sense of humanity and wit.
His influences include John Cleese, Tom
Sharpe, Kurt Vonnegut, James Patterson, Hunter S Thompson, Douglas
Adams, Imogen Edwards-Jones, Michael Frayn, Chris Morris, Jerry
Sadowitz, Christopher Hitchins, Bill Maher, George Carlin, Milo
Yiannopoulos and Larry Cohen.
One of the UK's most dedicated
provocateurs and contrarians, his obsessions include (and are
essentially limited to) unhealthy amounts of: smoking, drugs,
alcohol, caffeine, sex, arguing, fighting, vandalism, conjuring up
hilarious and nasty situations for his characters and writing about
himself in the third person.
Get in touch!
Andrew@chromevalleybooks.com
Subscribe to Chrome Valley Books and
get a free short story ‘One Size Fits All’, the prequel to ‘In
Their Shoes’, at http://bit.ly/subcvb
Places where you can
find me
Website
Facebook Author Page
Facebook Group
Amazon Author Page
Goodreads
Twitter
YouTube
WE’RE LOOKING FOR ARC
READERS!
📘📘📘📘
✮ Are you a fan of laughing so
much you think you may need medical assistance?
✮✮Are you a fan of humor
books with a good dose of satire?
✮✮✮Have you heard of
International best selling British satire author Andrew Mackay’? If
not, WHY NOT?!
✮✮✮✮Are you a fan of
being a part of an exclusive gang and winning awesome prizes?
📘📘📘📘
❤Here is your chance to become
a part of an exclusive gang - before
it’s too late!
How it works:
✮ We send you In Their Shoes:
The Trilogy. You read and review it at your own leisure.
✮ Once you have finished,
leave a review at Amazon US and UK (Mandatory). Goodreads is a bonus.
✮ We send the next book.
✮ Rinse, wash and repeat.
✮ You will always be the first
to receive pre-released copies. At the moment, there is a new release
around once a month.
Starting June 7th we are starting a new
contest! There will be a 70.00 gift card given away each month on the
7th if you have the book read and reviewed that was chosen for that
month! We ask that you read and review on Amazon US and UK
Being a member of Andrew’s ARC/Fan
Facebook group has many benefits. Apart from reducing you to tears of
outrage, shock and hilarity, you also get exclusive stuff; what he’s
working on next, giveaways, prizes, freebies and jars of his fluids*.
❤❤If there is a new release
that comes out you will get that one first. With each new release
there is a contest for ARC members. The contest consists of three
different prizes. Usually a sizeable Amazon GC being the biggest. A
signed paperback shipped at no cost to you anywhere in the world. And
prize number three will be a bit different every time. Depends on
what Andrew wants.
✮✮✮✮SO what the f**k are
you waiting for?! Join NOW by filling in the form, below!
🎥 🎥 Watch this! In Their
Shoes: The Nurse (Book V) Chapter 5: "Brown Girl In The Ring."
As read by Amazon Best-Selling author, Andrew Mackay.
*Subject to availability. (And probably a
signed paperback, rather than a jar of cum.)
Be
sure to check out the amazing giveaway on the Chrome Valley Books
page. The prize is a 100.00 gift card, A signed paperback And a
personalized email from Joy Attwood herself! It is the pinned post
follow this link http://bit.ly/2qrz7ri
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